On Love-excerpts from Krishnamurti's notebook.

I have been reading the book " Krishnamurti's notebook". It is a book in which he tries to capture the internal processes that are affecting him as he goes about in this quest of stillness and peace.it is a daily journal which he did not intend to get published initially. I came across a passage where he talks about what he thinks love is.

" Love is not attachment.Love does not yield sorrow.Love has no despair or hope. Love cannot be made respectable,part of the social scheme.when it is not there,every form of travail begins

To possess and to be possessed is considered a form of love.this urge to possess,a person or a piece of property,is not merely the demands of society and circumstances but springs from a far deeper source.it comes from the depths of loneliness"

The passage made me think .Lets try and go a bit deeper into his words. firstly what kind  of love is he talking about? Just the man-woman relationship? or does it encompass all sorts of love? The love a human feels for a dog and also the love the human can feel for a material possession?.I think we can assume he is talking about all kinds of love because he talks about the "urge to possess,a person or a piece of property"So he is not limiting himself to talk about just the man-woman kind of love or evn just love between humans.

So what the characteristics of love? He approaches it from saying what love is not.

Love is not attachment:just missing someone and not being able to do without him/her or it is not love. we are attached to our phones. we keep messaging,chatting what not with it all day. We really cant say we love our phones though. its one of the many ways our mind tries to trick us into filling our void with "stuff".Being attached is servile.it has a negative connotation.
Love has to be pure

Love does not yield sorrow: Love at no point should be the cause of sorrow.love os bliss.The love when a mother feeds a kid and watches it look satisfied and happy,that is love. Later on when he doesnt do well in school she sits and worry about his future.she says she worries out of love.But again love has degenerated into something else. Worldy needs and societal demands have clouded the mother's love.Love at no point can be the cause of sorrow.

Love has no despair or hope: we can call it a corollary of the previous characteristics. The desire to see the person you have affection for is again a worldly desire.The hope that both of you together will have a blissful time together is borne out of the mind needing comfort and meaning in everything.When that person does not come to meet you you feel despair.all this is not love.Love is a spiritual connection with another outside the realms of space and time and away from desire and despair.the moment either creeps in it ceases to be love.

Love cannot be made respectable:Here Krishna ji is trying to elude to societal norms which set the standards for our relationships.We marry a person because society tells us to have a family.we put up with evil minded relatives because society tells us to.Love is away from all this.THe love my dog feels for my cat is not taught by society.it is there.he just reaches out to it when he sees the cat and his whole world for that little short while is trying to play with the cat.he doesnt sit and think over this later on nor does he plan what he will do when he meets her next. They just meet and they are happy.That is love-no boundaries,no set of rules to adhere to.